Emotional Roller Coaster

I'm on an emotional roller coaster.

On the one hand, I'm thankful for God's blessings. Sometimes thinking of them makes me feel so overwhelmed with gratitude that my eyes overflow with tears. I'm thankful also for friends who recently showed compassion for me and commented when they noticed I wasn't feeling well (but I never said a word).

On the other hand, I wish I could just fall into the arms of a man I love and enjoy his warm, loving embrace. But there is no such man in my life, and I'm wondering if I'm destined to walk life's journey alone. Just to lay my head on his shoulder would be so lovely. I know I can lay my head on the Lord's shoulder and fall into his arms, and I should find comfort in that. But I've been so long without a significant other to talk to and hold close, and being patient is at times very difficult. I used to have a significant other, but it didn't work out for various reasons.

Sometimes I wonder if my being alone now is God's way of saying, "That's all you get. There isn't any more." But that would be heartless, and God isn't that way. Maybe He's just trying to teach me patience while he gets the right man ready for me and sends him my way. Maybe I still have some growing to do before God pairs me with another man.

For now, I remain hopeful. I have a relationship with Christ, and therefore, I am Never Alone.